What Really Happened
by beautifuldisaster10.20
Summary: Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fanfic. Or any of the references to Brand names and such. This if for all the McCollins-shipper out there. This is my personal take on what really happened in the Season 4 finale and the aftermath. Told in Andy's POV
1. Chapter 1

I rush towards Sam even before he hits the floor.

I don't think. I just use the reflexes I've gained through the job.

I apply pressure until the EMTs arrive, trying to keep Sam conscious.

His declaration earlier kept replaying in my mind. He said he made a mistake. He said he wanted me happy.

He almost said he loved me. Did he expect me to drop everything for him after that little speech? I mean, it's not like I haven't forgiven him for not waiting for me-because I truly have. I've moved on.

And after that stunt he asked me to pull off last week. That's a whole different problem right there. He asked me to do something unethical, something that could ruin my career-and I just _had_ to do it, didn't I?

"We have it from here, officer," I heard someone behind me say.

I look behind me and see EMTs.

Finally.

I let her take over, as I stand back.

I lock eyes with Nick, and he's looking at me as if he's been broken. But that look passes, and suddenly his gaze turns cold.

I walk to him, his gun is still in his hand. Shaking.

I take his hand, and try to loosen his grip on the gun. He flinches at the touch.

"Go," he tells me, nodding his head to the ambulance.

I shake my head, tears suddenly shedding.

He thinks I'd rather be with Sam.

"Go, I'm fine, really," he repeats, softer. His eyes taking on the broken look he just had a few moments ago.

He's letting me go. Giving me an out.

"No," I say defiantly.

He refuses to meet my eyes so I angle his head towards me.

"I am not going anywhere, okay? Nick, I am here. I'm not leaving you."

He finally meets my gaze.

And that's when the dam broke.

"You ran to him, Andy," his voice breaking.

"I know. I just felt so guilty. Because the first thought that crossed my mind when he got hit was 'thank God, it wasn't you'."

"I saw Ford pointing a gun at you. And all I could think of was 'Please let it be someone else'."

"You almost got shot, Nick. I am not going anywhere," I repeat.

I close my eyes, trying to will the tears to stop, but once they get out there's really nothing I can do except ride the emotions.

I feel his arms around me. And suddenly I feel like I can breathe.

I hug him back, not wanting to let go.

"Collins, we're gonna need your gun, and Callaghan will debrief you," I hear Frank say.

Nick pulls back first, but he gives me one of his smiles before answering Frank.

"Yes, sir."

Frank leaves us, probably heading to the hospital with the others.

"Hey, I think, I'm gonna head to my apartment tonight. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" He says before kissing me and leaving for the debrief.

Yeah, right. Like I'm gonna let him deal with this alone.

I go back to the locker room and scrub off the blood that got on me. What had happened to Sam scared me to the bone. But I could deal with that kind of scare. If Nick had been shot though, I don't think I would have been able to function properly.

I get the remaining blood off and changed out of my uniform. I grab my bag and sit on the bench in front of Nick's locker.

It wasn't long before I heard him enter the room. I was about to get up, but I heard a loud slam. His fist against the metal locker. Again. And again. When the slamming stopped, I got up.

"You were supposed to go home," he says.

"Yeah, well, I guess you didn't hear me earlier. I meant what I said, Nick. I'm not going anywhere."

"Andy, I'm not mad. I just- I just need to deal with all this adrenaline and crash..."

"Is that adrenaline blocking your ears, Collins? I am going with you. You almost got shot at today. I've been there, and I know I needed someone to just be there for me. So, I'm here, Nick. Like it or not, I'm here."

"I love it," I hear him whisper.

I raise an eyebrow at him. We've been skirting the topic for weeks now. Avoiding the L-word. And then _now_ he brings it up.

"I love you." I tell him, staring him in the eyes.

I don't give him time to respond, "So can we please go back to my apartment? It's nearer anyway, and I'll even let you cook me breakfast tomorrow!"

He shakes his head with a smile, "Lead the way."

I give him a peck on the cheek and lace my fingers around his.

We get to the apartment, both of us tired.

I head into the bathroom, needing a really warm shower. As I step into the shower, the bathroom door opens, Nick.

He wordlessly walks in and starts stripping off his clothes and gets in the shower with me.

I kiss him. Deeper and more meaningful than ever because I finally told him that I love him.

My hands travel upward to his hair and his hands travel to my waist.

He pushes me back against the wall, and the force knocks the air out of me.

"Sorry," he murmurs in between kisses.

Our breathing becomes more labored and finally we have to stop to catch our breath.

I reach for my shampoo and lather it between my hands before reaching out to Nick's hair.

He smiles at me, "Andy McNally, are you washing my hair for me?"

I stick my tongue out, "Maybe."

"I can do that, you know."

"I know, but I can't stop myself. I love your hair. And your eyes. And your adorable dimples. That little wrinkle on the side of your eyes when you smile at me-like that! And your lips. And- it's a long list," I confess.

"You're going soft on me McNally," he teases me.

I roll my eyes and start rinsing my hair.

As I start rinsing out his hair, his hands land on my waist again. And I can't control the goosebumps that surface all over my skin.

"I love that I have this effect on you," he whispers.

"I love your totally wild hair every morning. I love you weird taste in food-because you're the only one I know who eats my cooking. I love that you deny you snore every night, even though it's true," I punch him lightly, "they're baby snores. Cute, little baby snores. That I can't sleep without. I love that you always wake up after me because that gives me time to just look at you in a totally non-creeper way. And I love that you think you said 'I love you' first."

"Hey now. I did say it first though!" I said.

"Nope," he gives me a knowing smile.

"When?"

"Everyday since our first night together," he says as he turns off the shower and reaches for our towels.

"I though that was just part of my dream... every night," I say, wrapping the towel around me before the cold sinks in.

"I love that you told me anyway," he says before kissing me.

I let him exit the shower first, needing a clear path to my closet because I hate the cold floor.

Nick keeps blocking my path though.

With his boxers finally on, he walks back to me.

He gives me his Linkin Park shirt and my favorite boy shorts and waits for me to dress up in the shower.

Once I finished he literally sweeps me off of my feet and brings me to bed.

"You were right. I didn't want to be alone tonight. Thank you for being you. I love you, Andy."

He climbs into bed and I immediately snuggle closer to him.

"I love you, Nick Collins."

I feel his heart start beating faster.

"Move in with me, Andy."

"Okay," I answer in less that a heartbeat.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know Nick is calling out to me.

"Andy, wake up. You're having a nightmare," he says as he kissed my temple.

I finally have the strength to open my eyes and I realize I was crying in my sleep.

I rack my brain for the reason and it goes rushing back to me.

I dreamt that Nick was the one that got shot.

"You almost got shot," I whisper.

I know I said those words last night, but now it sunk in.

Nick could have been the one bleeding on the floor.

"But I didn't," he says to calm me.

But it's not working. Once my mind goes down a path, there's no turning back.

"I don't want to lose you Nick," I say, stifling sobs.

He kisses me, helping me get control of my breathing.

Once my lungs remembered how to breathe on their own, Nick gets on top of me. And I see the look in his eyes.

He wipes away my tears and I let go of a strangled laugh, "This is perfect. You almost get shot, and I'm the one needing comforting. I'm the best girlfriend ever."

"You are the best girlfriend ever. Thank you for worrying about me," he says, planting kisses on my neck, right behind my earlobe.

A shiver passes through us both, and I feel the urge to touch him everywhere. I don't want anything separating us anymore.

I give him a slight push on the shoulder and straddle him.

"Hey, did I mention I like you in my shirt?" He asks me.

"No, but I was kinda thinking you'd like me even more without it," I say, grabbing the hem of his shirt and pulling it off of me.

His eyes grow with hunger and I can't take it anymore. I kiss him. Every kiss a whisper of how much I love him.

After reaching our breaking points, we both fall asleep. A deeper and more calming sleep.  
I wake up again, and the sun is up as well. I'm still tangled up with Nick under the sheets. I feel his even breathing as I turn to look at him. I get a few moments before he starts to wake up.

"Morning," I smile at him.

"You're supposed to wake up after me," he says.

"Was I? I don't know, I kinda like the view when I wake up before you though," I smile.

He just smiles and shakes his head at me.

"You want breakfast?" He asks as he starts to get up.

I hold him down, "No, I just wanna stay here. We can eat later."

He laughs at me, "Okay. So what do you want to do today?"

"Talk. Let's play 20 questions. But we split it. So we ask each other 10 questions, but we also need to answer our own questions."

I give him a second to think about it.

I see him nod.

"Where'd you grow up?" I start.

"Just here. Toronto. This was-_is_ home. Grew up as a foster kid, but I got really great parents. I never really did anything to make them proud when I was a kid."

"Which was why you joined the army?" I clarified.

"I count that as question number two. Yes, it was the only way I knew I could make them proud. I was never a good student, always getting into fights, so I thought I'd use my skill set to my advantage. My turn, where did you grow up?"

"Same. Toronto as well. But mostly I grew up in 15. My dad would always take me to the station during his night shift since no one could look after me. At first it felt weird, you know? Like being the only kid there, but it felt like home."

"Okay. Now for the serious questions. First boyfriend."

I bury my head in my pillow, "Really?"

"Really." I don't even have to see him to know that he's smiling.

"Second year high school. His name was Aiden and he was mean. You?"

"First girlfriend was my neighbor's kid. Her name was Sarah, and she was gorgeous."

I punch him on the shoulder.

"Kidding. I was kidding. She was my only friend. And I thought I _had_ to like her in that way so we tried it for a bit. Didn't work out."

"I'm getting hungry. Can I skip to my tenth question?" He asks.

I nod, not being able to say no to him.

"When did you know?"

He didn't have to elaborate the question. I knew he what he was asking me.

"Frank and Noelle's wedding. When you called Dov just because I wanted to hear them say their vows. I knew it then, but I was just so scared. You and Gail, yeah, was I really ready to be part of that drama? When I had just ended _my_ drama? And then you go and say that line about me being magical, which kind of scared me because I felt the exact same thing about you. You?"

"UC. When they told me to shoot you? I was so angry then. I thought of 3 different scenarios where I could kill them, before they hurt you. But then I came back to my senses. I felt the gun's weight and I realized it was a test. I swear to God, Andy, I was sure the gun wasn't loaded. I would never point it at you, let alone pull the trigger if there was a chanceit was loaded. I just-the way you looked at me when I pulled the trigger. I would never do anything to put that same expression on your face again-"

"I believe you," I say before kissing him.

And I do believe him. For the first time in my life, I know I can trust this person to not let me down. 


	2. Chapter 2

Nick finally got me to get off of bed by using coffee and food.

We spent the whole morning in my apartment. Happy.

We were sitting on the sofa. And I smile at the thought that this was the first place we spent together.

"What are you smiling about?" I hear Nick ask.

"It's just _really_ good to be in love," I answer.

His smile warms.

"So I was thinking..." I trail off.

"Yeah?" He probes me.

"I wanted to bring this sofa with us when we get our new apartment," I smile.

"Really? You're not taking it back? I had this pit in my stomach since breakfast. I thought you were gonna say we were moving too quick," Nick explains, playing with my fingers.

"Nick, I meant everything I said last night," I tell him.

He gives me one of his smiles and leans in to kiss me.

"You think looking for a new apartment on our next day off is too quick?" He asks me.

"No, I think that's a great idea," I reply.

"You wanna go to the hospital?" He asks me.

I don't miss the hesitation in his voice.

I nod, "Yeah, but we better bring Oliver food. If we visit him empty-handed we'll never hear the end of it."

"Donuts then?" He says.

I laugh, at his stereotype suggestion.

We both get ready and take his jeep to the hospital.

As we enter the hospital, I feel the absence of tension. Everyone is going to be okay.

We head to Oliver first. As we enter his room, we see Cellery by his side.

"Hey, how's he doing?" I ask.

"_He_ is miraculously doing just fine with the crappy food in here," Oliver himself answered me.

"Well then it's a good thing we brought donuts, isn't it?" Nick asked as he put the box on the table.

Oliver narrows his eyes at Nick, "I hate the stereotype, but I love these donuts. Ergo, you are forgiven for coming to visit me late," he says as he takes a bite of the donut.

We talk for a few more minutes before Nick and I said we still needed to visit the others.

We take an elevator ride to the ICU, and as soon as we step off, I spot Dov.

A train wreck.

"Hey," I say quietly.

He looks up at me, "Hi."

"Is she doing okay?" I ask.

"I don't know. They brought her into the OR this morning, and nobody will tell me anything," he whispers harshly.

"Mr. Epstein? Hi, I'm John. I was the resident surgeon in Ms. Price's surgery earlier. I just wanted you to know that everything went smoothly and that we're out of the woods. It's a good thing you convinced her husband to sign the consent forms. All things permitting, Ms. Price should regain consciousness by this evening," the doctor in scrubs said.

First of all. Yey! Chloe's okay.

Secondly. Husband?!

I look to Dov to gauge his reaction.

He just gives the doctor a nod and shakes his hand.

Once the doctor leaves, Dov slumps back into his chair.

"I swear, sometimes I think Chloe's trying to kill me," he manages a joke.

So I guess he knows about the husband?

"She's a tough girl, Dov," Nick says as he gives Dov a pat on the shoulder.

He gives out a strangled laugh, but a few tears come out.

"Hey, listen. We'll just pass by Sam's room to check up on him and Marlo, then we're heading out. Once we're done, you want us to give you a ride to your apartment?" Nick offers.

Dov shakes his head, "No, I wanna be here when she wakes up. I don't want her to be alone."

"Come on Dov, I don't think Chloe wants to see you in uniform when she wakes up. And she won't want such an empty room. Let's go pick up some stuff of hers and make it feel more home-y and Chloe," I persuaded.

That made him think for a bit.

"All right. Just pass by for me after you visit Swarek," he agrees.

I smile, "No problem. We'll be back in 5."

I start walking forward, but then I don't feel Nick behind me.

I turn around.

"Maybe you want to go alone?" He asks.

I shake my head, "Come on, you work with him too. And plus, I want to make sure Marlo's doing all right."

I lace my fingers through his and we both start walking to Sam's room.

I knock once before opening the door.

I see Marlo pacing back and forth at the foot of the bed.

"Hey, you doing okay?" I ask Marlo quietly, seeing Sam was asleep.

She gives me a small smile, "It was a flesh wound. Through and through. Managed to miss all the organs. He was lucky."

I nod, but repeat my question, "That's great, but how are _you?_"

She nods, then shakes her head, "Hanging in there. The fact that Sam's okay helps."

I give her a hug, "We're heading out now, but if you need anything-anything-just call me."

"Thanks, Andy. For everything," she whispers.

"No biggie. It's in the job description. Serve, protect and don't screw up," I joke, which gets her to smile again.

Nick and I leave the room as quietly as possible.

"You sure you don't want to wait for him to wake up and talk to him?" Nick asks me as we walk back to Dov.

I nod, "Marlo said he was okay, and I saw that she was okay too. That's all I needed to know."

Dov walks up to us, "Come on, let's do this quickly."

We stop by the station so that Dov can surrender his gun and change out of his uniform. Then we drive to his apartment so that he can pick up his and Chloe's stuff. And finally we drop him back off at the hospital, all in 30 minutes.

On the drive to Nick's apartment, we stop by a pizza place for take out for our movie-in.

When we get into his apartment, I head straight to the bed, while Nick picks a movie.

I feel him unzipping my boots as he sits on the bed.

I turn to look at him and smile, "I love you. God, it feels so good to say that to you."

He leans in and gives me a quick kiss, "I love you too."

He settles on the bed and hands me a slice of pizza.

We both start eating while Doom plays on the t.v.

"Hey don't let me fall asleep, okay? My shift starts in the morning tomorrow, and I haven't done my laundry here yet," I say, feeling my eyelids drop.


	3. Chapter 3

I remember finishing the movie, but the next thing I know, I hear my alarm ringing.

"God, what time is it?" I hear Nick ask.

Shit. I never went home last night.  
I immediately shoot up from the bed, "I need to get home and shower." I say in a panicked voice.

"Andy, chill. You must still have clean clothes here," Nick says, turning to me.

"I already used everything, all I have is..." my emergency underwear in my bag.

"Dibs, on the bathroom!" I shout even though I know Nick doesn't even have to take a bath until noon.

I take a shower and start dressing up. Using the jeans from yesterday, and picking a white button-down of Nick's. I fold the sleeves and tuck it in. There! That should be okay.

I open the door to the bedroom and I hear Nick blow a whistle.

"Damn, I really love seeing you in my clothes. The only problem is that every time I see you in my clothes, I wanna take it off of you," he says as he walks towards me.

I avoid him, "Nick, I need to go to work."

A smile appears on his face, telling me he was just teasing me.

I smirk, as I hug him, "Well you can take it off of me after work. Oh wait, we have different shifts today. That sucks. Guess I'll just take it off of myself later."

His smile disappears. I quickly give him a kiss, and run out the door before he catches me.

I text him as I enter the station, "_I was kidding earlier. Of course you'll take it off of me later ;). Oh! And I forgot to tell you this before I left. I love you, Nick Collins! xx"_

I put on my uniform and enter the parade room.

I see Frank behind the podium with a relaxed smile.

Guess he heard everyone was going to be all right.

I turn to look behind me, casing the roster of officers for the day.

Chris, Gail, Tracy, Steve, Noelle, and a few new faces.

Rookies.

"All right people. As all of you know, we had a hell of a day last Wednesday. But I'm happy to tell all of you that everyone is on their way to recovery. And one of them just couldn't keep himself on his ass for longer than a day. So can we please give a round of applause to Officer Shaw who shall grace us with his presence," Frank announces.

Everyone claps their hands and turns to look at the door.

Oliver comes in and does the regal wave, which earns more applause.

"Thank you, thank you. I just couldn't let myself stay in bed. I knew you guys wouldn't be able to function without me," he says in Oliver-fashion.

Behind him, I see Nick with a smile.

His eyes find mine.

"You knew?" I mouthed.

He just shrugs at me.

I give my best you'll-never-hear-the-end-of-this-from-me look.

"Now, I heard today will be the day we take in new officers from the academy. I couldn't miss that now, could I? I mean, it wouldn't be a true rookie welcome without me here, right?" Oliver says.

He's beside Frank on the podium now.

"Now, which one of them is mine?" Oliver asks Frank conspiratorially.

Frank shakes his head, "As much as we love having you back, I can't send you back into the street today. So you and your rookie will have to have fun at booking," Frank tells Oliver.

"Oh, Frank, you know me. I can have fun anywhere," Oliver says.

Frank gave the assignments to each officer.

Oliver, Noelle and Steve got the new rookies. While Chris and I got to share a car.

As soon as we got to our car, Nick came up in uniform.

"Hey Diaz, you mind switching with me? I'm supposed to be covering for Dov, but..."

"Say no more Collins. I'll ride with Gail," Diaz says as he throws Nick the keys.

"Hey! I wanted to drive," I scold Chris.

He rolls his eyes at me and walks away.

Nick and I both get into the 1520 squad car, him in the driver's seat, and head to our assigned area.

Nick plays some of his cheesy music on the stereo, while I divide my time with glancing at him and keeping a look out on the streets.

I notice we aren't taking the most direct route to our area.

"Nick?"

"Yeah?"

"Is this when you kill me?" I ask jokingly.

He laughs at my silly joke, "Yeah, this was my plan all along. Make you fall in love with me, and then one day when you're not expecting it, put poison in your favorite bagel," he says menacingly.

He stops the squad car right outside Pi.

"You are a miracle worker," I say as I take out my wallet.

"This one is on me," he tells me with a smile.

"But... fine, next time, I'm paying," I compromise.

He gives me a grin that says unlikely, but he won't push the issue.

He leaves the squad and my eyes follow him.  
I feel butterflies and all those good stuff because of Nick.

The radio sounds, "Patrolling officers, reported robbery in progress at Haynes and Smiths Family Bank at 5th corner 11th."

"1520. We're at 5th corner 11th. I'll go check it out," I say.

"Copy 1520. SWAT is 7 minutes out."

I catch Nick's eyes as I exit the squad.

"Looks like we'll have to have a raincheck on breakfast. Robbery at Haynes and Smith down the block," I tell him.

His eyes immediately narrows, "Let's go check it out."

We both head to the bank. From the outside, nothing seems wrong, but as soon as we get a glimpse of the inside we see at least 10 people on the floor, face down.

I radio it in, "Dispatch, be advised, at least 10 hostages in the bank."

"5-man op," Nick whispers to me.

"Looks like it's a 5-man job," I repeat Nick's observation.

"Copy, 1520. Can you get a closer look at the hostages? Get a specific number."

"Copy, dispatch," I say.

"Cover me, I need to get a closer look," I tell Nick, already moving forward.

He grabs my arm, "I'll do it."

I give him a look, "You're too big to fit under the window pane. They'll see you as soon as you sit there. Plus you're a better shot than me. I trust you," I say before slowly moving forward towards the window.

Immediately, I see 5 men standing with semi-automatic weapons. Ski-masks, gloves and over-alls. I lock eyes with one of them and duck my head immediately.

Shots go through the window and I hear screams from inside. Suddenly, I hear a loud explosion and people from the bank rush out.

Nick must have called out to me because he's now dragging me away from the bank.

I gather my senses, and see SWAT arrive and take over the scene.

"Lock it down. We need to get the statements of all the witnesses. And could somebody tell me why the shooters went berserk even before we arrived?" The man shouted.

I immediately raise my hand, and feel a jolt of pain in my shoulder. I ignore it for now. "That was my fault, sir. I was trying to get a better head count of the hostages when one of them spotted me."

He grunts at me, "Tell me you at least got a head count."

I nod, "Thirteen."

"All right officer McNally, you can go back to the station now. You've done enough here," he says.

I want to tell him that I can actually help, but he doesn't exactly give me a chance.

Nick comes up to me, "Come on, let's go back to 15."

"Just a second. I want to see the back alley," I tell him as I move forward.

"Andy, wait," he says as he grabs my right arm. Another jolt of pain goes through my shoulder, but this time it catches me by surprise.

I yelp a little, before I get to bite my lip.

"Andy?" I hear Nick's voice.

"Shoulder," I answer his silent question.

"Shit, Andy. You were shot," he tells me.

"So that's what the pain is?" I dead pan.

"We have to get you checked out," Nick says.

"Nick, I'm not bleeding. The vest did its job," I try to reassure him.

"Andy," he says with a tone.

"All right, all right. Can we check the back alley first, before I get sentenced to desk duty?" I bargain.

"Fine," he concedes.

We head to the back alley, and I start casing it.

It's a dead-end alley, with only one entry point. This could be where the assailants planned to escape, but there aren't any tread marks.

"Okay, you've seen the alley, can we go now?" Nick asks, though he's already hustling me to the ambulance.

I roll my eyes.

The EMTs check me out. Just bruising in the shoulder, otherwise I'm okay.

The man who shouted at me earlier comes up to me, "Looks like your math skills need some brushing up on. There were 18 hostages, not 13."

Wait. Hold up.

I counted 13. I'm sure of it.

I grab Nick by the arm and pull him nearer, "I think the robbers maybe mixed in with the hostages."

Nick's eyes begin to scan the crowd, "That makes a lot of sense since there weren't any tread marks in the alley. Do you remember anything that can single them out?"

I scan through my memories, "I remember they were wearing overalls. Ski-masks were covering their faces... Tattoo! One of them had a David's star on their right forearm and one of them had a teardrop under his left eye."

We immediately spot the man with the teardrop tattoo. He was more like a kid.

Nick went to talk to the leader of SWAT while I kept an eye on the suspect.

From the corner of my eye I see the SWAT commander give me a nod to signal me to flank the suspect while they approach him from the front.

Everything goes smoothly up until the suspect suddenly turns around to look at me and pulls out a revolver from his front pocket.

I pull my gun out, but I know its too late. I just brace myself for the impact.

I feel one shot hit me. And then I hear another shot that's probably from Nick or SWAT.

My legs give out, and my eyes automatically shut. I hear Nick calling me, but it's a while before I open my eyes.

I see Nick panicking.

I want to tell him I'm all right. That the vest did its job for the second time today. But something catches in my throat. Something thicker than water.

I hold his hand because that's all I can do. That captures his attention. He gives me a weak smile, which I return to him.

"You're fine, Andy. You're fine. You just have to keep those eyes of your open okay?" He tells me.

And despite the gravity of the situation, I believe his words.

"I love you, Andy McNally. So just keep your eyes open for me okay? You know why I love your eyes? Because every time I look at them I see the future. _Our_ future. It gives me hope, you know? Like this isn't all that we're meant to be. Like there's something more for us. And I want that with you, Andy. So please, Andy, keep your eyes open," he pleads.

And I do, right up until the point I lose consciousness. 


	4. Chapter 4

I wake up now and then. Not entirely sure where I am or what's happening. But I feel him there, next to me. Nick.

The first time I regain some lucidity, I think I was in an ambulance. The EMTs were telling Nick to just follow in the squad car, but Nick forced himself into the ambulance wordlessly and held my hand.

The next time I kind of woke up, I may have been in the hospital. I felt something sharp stab me in the chest and I suddenly feel like I had the energy to get up, but as sudden as the jolt of energy arrived it went away as quickly too.

And now, I feel calmer, but still tired. I'm slightly afraid to open my eyes and find out where I am. I know it's irrational, but I feel anxious. Like when I open my eyes, I might find out that everything after UC was nothing more but a dream.

I feel more and more anxious, but as I start to move my hand, I realize someone's been holding me the whole time. It gives me strength because I know the feel of this hand. It's Nick.

"Hey," I hear him talk to me, even though I haven't opened my eyes.

"You don't have to force yourself, okay? I know you're tired, but I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. And I can wait, as long as it takes, okay? So no hurry."

I tear up, chastising myself for thinking that Nick was a dream. Despite his reassuring speech, I force my eyes to open.

As soon as my eyes adjust to the lighting, I see Nick looking at me.

"Hey," I say back with a smile.

His red eyes widen and his grip on my hand tightens.

"Andy," he whispers.

"What? You had so much to say while I was out, now you go mute?" I joke.

He looks at me like he's unsure of what to do.

"Nick, I'm really awake, okay?" I say.

His eyes grow with relief, "God, Andy. I'm just. I don't know where to start. Is it too soon to remind you that I love you?"

I shake my head, "Definitely not too soon. Because I love you too."

"I really missed you. Lemme just go call the doctor," he says as he stands and kisses my temple.

The doctor tells me that I've been out for three days. He tells me that I was shot in my abdomen just below my vest. And to Nick's horror, the doctor even told me how persistent Nick was with getting updates when I was unconscious.

Dr. Samson prescribed me pain meds and antibiotics for when I get out. Which he said would be in three days. He told me the usual stuff, no operating heavy machinery, stay with someone who can keep an eye on me, and come back 2 times a week for a month for physical therapy. 


	5. Chapter 5

It's been 6 months since the incident. There hasn't been any life-threatening incidents again, though I might've jinxed that just by thinking it.

Marlo broke up with Sam. They're both doing better, but I think Marlo just needed a fresh start. Which was why she moved to Montreal and started studying art history.

Sam is... Sam. Trying to play the tough guy. He says he's all right, even though I see he's pushing himself into work harder than normal. We don't talk about the speech he said before he was shot, and I don't mind. I don't avoid him, and he doesn't avoid me. We have an unspoken agreement of being in that limbo place between acquaintances and friends.

Tracy and Steve are going steady. And Leo really likes him! He's a good guy, good to Trace and good for Leo.

Chris is dating one of the new rookies-Megan. He wasn't really serious about it because of what happened before, but we knocked some sense into him.

And Nick. Nick is smiling right at me. He still manages to make butterflies appear in my stomach and make my heart skip a beat. I smile right back at him.

"What are you smiling about?" He asks me.

"You," I answer bluntly.

"I love that answer," he says before he gives me a quick kiss.

"Get a room," I hear Gail say from behind me.

I turn to look at her.

"I gave you my blessing, but that doesn't mean you can cause public indecency. Last time I checked, I'm still a cop who can arrest people who do that."

She gives me a mean look that softens into a smile, "I really missed you."

I roll my eyes, "You could have visited me in the hospital-"

"And expose myself to _germs_? I love you, but I don't love you _that_ much."

I see Chloe push through the doors of 15, Dov right behind her.

We all start clapping. It the first time since the incident that she came back to the division.

She has longer hair now-and a wedding ring?!

Dov catches my eye and just shrugs.

"Married? You guys got yourself married without me? You know how much I love weddings!" I whined.

"Oh don't worry, Andy. I got him to promise me a big'ol Church wedding," Chloe said with a grin.

"Yey! This is gonna be so much fun!" I hear Gail retort.

"It's nice to see you too, Gail," Chloe replied.

They do the rest of their rounds while Nick and I just watch them.

"So, Andy McNally, are you the type of girl that dreams of _big_ weddings?" I hear Nick ask me.

"Why? You planning something Nick Collins?" I deflect with a smile.

"I don't know, should we?" He smiles at me.

I see what he's doing. He's testing the waters. He's afraid I'll run if things get too serious, too fast.

"I'm a small wedding kinda girl. As long as I have the right guy beside me, and I hear the magical words, that would be perfect," I finally answer his question.

"And how do you feel about engagements?"

"Should be short. Like a quick interlude to marriage," I half-joke.

He scans the crowd, "Come with me."

He takes my hand and leads me to the locker room. He starts taking off his vest.

"Uhh. Nick, I love you and all, but this really isn't the most romantic place to do _it_," I laugh.

He continues to take off his vest, "When I was in the army, some of my buddies taught me to write prayers on my vest, or like letters to loved ones whenever I had to go on a mission that wasn't exactly 'Driving Ms. Daisy'."

He hands me his vest, "I wrote this down 6 months ago."

I flip the vest over, the words are a little faded, but I can still read them out.

_I'm not sure who'll be reading this, but lucky you. You get to read a love letter._  
_I love Andrea McNally. Clear as day. _  
_I love her. _  
_As I'm writing this, I'm scared out of my mind because I haven't told her that I love her yet and I'm about to step out of this precinct with literally a target on my back. _  
_I promise myself that by the time anyone reads this, I've already told Andrea McNally I love her. _  
_And if luck is on my side, I've already asked her the most important question I'll ever ask anyone. _  
_And she said yes._

I look back up and see Nick leaning on his locker.

He gauges my reaction before taking a knee to the ground, "Andy McNally, will you go down to the courthouse after our shift ends and marry me?"

He takes out a small box from his pocket and opens it.

I nod my head, not able to find words.

He slips the ring on my finger and gets up to kiss me.

"We could probably do it over our lunch break," I say with a grin, finally able to form words.

"Don't tempt me," he says with his own grin.


End file.
